rediscovering eden
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Who am I, that the Lord of all the earth
Would care to know my name
Would care to feel my hurt
Who am I, that the bright and morning Star
Would choose to light the way
For my ever wandering heart
Not because of who I am
But because of what You've done
Not because of what I've done
But because of who You are
I am a flower quickly fading
Here today and gone tomorrow
A wave tossed in the ocean
A vapor in the wind
Still You hear me when I'm calling
Lord, You catch me when I'm falling
And You've told me who I am
I am Yours, I am Yours
Who am I, that the eyes that see my sin
Would look on me with love
and watch me rise again
Who am I, that the voice that calmed the sea
Would call out through the rain
And calm the storm in me
Whom shall I fear
Whom shall I fear
I am yours
dailies
Monday, September 25, 2006
-11:04 AM
I am ugly. Terribly ugly recently. How can I be losing patience? I still have this virtue with children (haha) but not with adults. Something is wrong. Am I expecting too much from adults? Such as that I expect them to have the same frequency as me? Don't tell me that it is communication barrier? At times, I need to explain more than once to my students on certain concepts, but ultimately, they get it. But when I have to do so for adults, I feel that it is so trying. Feel like bursting at times. What is God trying to teach me this time round?
Don't ask for my opinions when you already have an inkling on what to do or that you already have a decision! What is the point? Attempting to frustrate me? You have succeeded though. Feel so ineffective! Futile effort in trying to make you comprehend. Why can't you understand? What don't you understand about? How can I make you understand? I explained. I demonstrated. I illustrated. I tried drawing. I tried taking in deep breathes before I opened my mouth. Help me! Exhausted my tolerance level? Duh.
On a happy note, I had fun with Esther, Faith and Krystal. We went swimming on Saturday. That dare-devil went flaunting her PR skills again. She is adorable beyond description, just like Joash! They make me gush with excitement and my eyes twinkle like stars. Haha. As Esther toddled in the water, we surrounded her. We laughed as she splashed the water and giggled loudly at herself. Babies are heaven sent. Really!
I can't wait to baby-sit Joash too. You should see the look in his eyes. Argh… he just captures your attention, and affection, though Tommy and Sharon lamented that I wouldn't want to see him when he is crying. I believe so, too. Haha. They are always lovely when they smile. But when they are agitated, oooooo! Just like some (or should I say most?) adults, we are angels when everything is smooth-sailing. The malevolence arises when we are stressed, provoked, stretched.
Dear friend, you have been telling me about your past life experiences. You are fuming with annoyance and filled with anger, and bitterness. You repeated it - If there ever is a god, he is playing with you. Toying with you maliciously. What a fine analogy of making you a top-notch IT person but placing you in country with no computers. Maybe I am just simple. Maybe I have not been through enough. But life is never fair. It never is meant to be. I empathise with you and your disappointments in your life but I believe you will make it. And I will be praying for you. You believe in not being a liability to your friends. As much as your philosophy leads you, I know you will be an asset to many. May your heart be softened towards a real God. May you open your eyes and ears to see and hear to testify to His goodness one day. I wish I could help you but I am not God. Neither am I a saviour.