gil is a child of God

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rediscovering eden

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Who am I, that the Lord of all the earth
Would care to know my name
Would care to feel my hurt
Who am I, that the bright and morning Star
Would choose to light the way
For my ever wandering heart

Not because of who I am
But because of what You've done
Not because of what I've done
But because of who You are

I am a flower quickly fading
Here today and gone tomorrow
A wave tossed in the ocean
A vapor in the wind
Still You hear me when I'm calling
Lord, You catch me when I'm falling
And You've told me who I am
I am Yours, I am Yours

Who am I, that the eyes that see my sin
Would look on me with love
and watch me rise again
Who am I, that the voice that calmed the sea
Would call out through the rain
And calm the storm in me

Whom shall I fear
Whom shall I fear
I am yours

who am i

: Name: Gillian; Location: Singapore

A simple girl who appreciates the simple things in life... ...

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dailies

Wednesday, October 31, 2007

-5:13 PM

关怀方式

寂寞开在心事旁
随手种一些伤感
不让星星来窥探
找个沉默的夜晚

找个沉默的夜晚
不让星星来窥探
随手种一些伤感
寂寞开在心事旁

我的关怀方式是你无法察觉的悲凉
只能在你不经意时才锁上我心房
你往常的亲切友善是我今生的遗憾
受伤後无悔的埋在不流露的脸上

-12:10 AM

Went to Billy Bombers with Marie, Shuxin and Sylvia before we went to school early to do our group project. I love the music being played there and I am sure Marie feels the same too. We would often hum along and guess what was the song for that day? It was an itsy bitsy teenie weenie yellow polka dot bikini... ... Alright, we are not as ancient as you think we are!

Don't know what is the actual name for this gadget. Is it a Jukebox? All I know is that it is just a white elephant.

This is a basket of fries totally soaked (almost typed in 'socked') in cheese. The cheese isn't as thick as it should have been. Neither are the fries fried well enough. Still, it was such a sinful indulgence.

Forgot the name of this dish but we found that it is not worth the money. Although the pieces of chicken were really crispy (Jojo will love this) and that the potato salad (very 'onionised') was a sweet surprise, we thought that the chef could be more generous with the portion. Oh, and I love the honey mustard too! =*)

Presenting the All Star Burger (though I see no stars)! The feeling was heavenly as the uncooked egg yolks swam with the enzymes in our mouths and slowly made their way down our throats effortlessly. >_<

Shuxin couldn't receive the temptation of the strawberries on the cheesecake at the cafe in the library. But personally, I don't find it that marvelous. The pastry seemed to be not fully cooked and the cheese was not moist enough. But the aroma which escaped from the rosy red fruits may be enough to leave some asking for more. Feel the urge to bake now! ;p

Met the three sapient musketeers while we (or at least I was, so much so I didn't realise that they were around) were deep in our discussion. We had the Shy, the Sweet and the Sharp. =S Sylvia was wondering if DBL could remember her. I sure am glad MKO remembers our names definitely!

Monday, October 29, 2007

-11:54 PM

Tommy got this for me quite some time ago. Thanks, father of my godson! Heehee.

Was walking back home with dad the other day when this caught my attention. The moon was so round that night that I couldn't resist taking a picture of it!

We had our last lecture today with DBL and he gave these to each of us. All of a sudden, I feel like a student in Primary School! Was over the moon, in fact, because I was very touched by his gesture. This is probably the third time I receive a 'gift' from my lecturers / tutors through my past two years in NIE! And both Marie and I thought that he looks very cute when he smiles - his Bugs Bunny teeth are adorable. Hee.

I didn't ask God why when good things happen, so I don't question too when bad things strike.

Beyond us God within us
Revealed yet we see in part
Transcendent but so near us
Mystery dwelling within our hearts

Majestic God above us
Enthroned yet You wash our feet
Humble but so holy
All of creation bow when You speak

Sunday, October 28, 2007

-10:55 PM

So cute!!!!! Guess which is my favourite?

-10:47 PM

Ah Lek was asked to make a sentence using 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10. Not only did he do it 1 to 10, he did it again from 10 back to 1.

This is what he came up with.....

1 day I go 2 climb a 3 outside a house to peep. But the couple saw me, so I panic and 4 down. The man rushed out and wanted to 5 with me. I ran until I fell 6 and threw up. So I go into 7-eleven and grabbed some 8 to throw at him. Then I took a 9 and try to stab at him. 10 God he run away.10 I put the 9 back and pay for the 8 and left 7-eleven. Next day I called my boss and told him I was 6. He said 5, tomorrow also no need to come back 4 work. He also asked me to go climb a 3 and jump down. I don't understand. I am so nice 2 him but I don't know what he 1.

-10:42 PM

UPGRADE FROM BOYFRIEND TO HUSBAND

Dear IT Support,

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband1.0 and noticed a slow down in the overall performance, particularly in the flower, gifts and jewellery applications that had operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0. In addition, Husband 1.0 un-installed many other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5, but installed undesirable programs such as Formula One 5.0, NBA 3.0 and World Cup 2.0. And now Conversation 8.0 no longer runs and House Cleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system. I've tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail. What can I do?

Signed,
Desperate Housewife

Reply:

Dear Desperate Housewife,

First keep in mind: Boyfriend 5.0 is an entertainment package, while Husband 1.0 is an operating system. Try entering the command C:\ I THOUGHT YOU LOVED ME and download Tears 6.2 to install Guilt 3.0. If all works as designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications Jewellery 2.0 andFlowers 3.5. But remember, overuse can cause Husband 1.0 todefault to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0 or Late Night Teh Tarik 6.1. Late Night 6.1 is a very bad program that will create Snoring Loudly.wav files. Whatever you do, DO NOT install Mother-in-Law 1.0 or reinstall another Boyfriend program. These are not supported applications and will crash Husband 1.0. In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have a limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider additional software to improve memory and performance. I personally recommend Hot Tasty Food 3.0 and Tongkat Ali 6.9.

Good Luck,
IT Support

-9:29 PM

Celebrated Esther's birthday on Saturday with her family and my extended family (TomSumJo) at Swenson's. The girl turns three! My heart melts whenever she calls me 'ji lian jie jie'. =D

Am missing him already! I know that he is not very far from me but... wonder if he is eating well over there. Can he sleep at night? Is he drinking enough water? Is the training getting tough? This Ah Di will be out soon, right? Be praying for Didar. NS should be a breeze for him?

Something so trivial could aggravate to this? Is it a lack of trust? Nah... Perhaps it is too superficial to withstand a small storm? Could it be just the tip of an iceberg? Well... =s

-9:28 PM

-9:12 PM

Been busy answering questions from students via e-mail. I realize that it is rather tough to put into words the explanations that I would like to offer them for especially Math word problems. It seems to be just tackling with numbers but it is more than that! Yes, tuitions have ended officially but that does not stop them from bombarding me with a thousand and one questions. It is not really part of my job any more but I did tell them to e-mail or call me if they have difficulties with their work. And they did! I mean, some of them do not have the luxury to engage private tutors so I am keen to help them, provided that they are willing to learn. Although my time is taken up and there is opportunity costs involved, I know that it is more blessed to give than to receive.

It is mind boggling but I choose to leave it as that. Many choose to ignore while I choose to face. Many choose to waste while I choose to save. Many choose to stop while I choose to continue. Many choose to take while I choose to give. The bottom-line – I made a choice.

The gingerbread man...

The parrot, whose ‘harlow’ I could imitate very well!

Mummy's preserved mangoes.

The prince and princess... but that does not make me the nanny...

Friday, October 26, 2007

-10:25 PM

It must be her most sophisticated toy? She actually took it from the table, slung it onto her tiny hand, started snapping and then showing the pictures she took to her models. All these happened only after one mere demonstration by me! I must admit that there are a few pretty good shots taken and we were all pleasantly surprised. Talk about spatial intelligence at work. I mean, she is barely three! I got a good shock when she looked at the camera and even took a few pictures of herself with her rather short hands. Esther is such a darling!

Enjoy the pictures below, all taken by Esther, the youngest queen!

-10:24 PM

-10:02 PM

It was Didar’s last night before his National Service. We gathered at Kenneth’s place and as usual, the punk was inevitable with the ceremony of cutting his hair, shaving his leg hair (alright, just a little bit) etc. I am going to miss him so much! But I believe he will emerge a warrior with the training in there. Of course, we had lots of fun with the two little ones. We prayed for him before leaving with hugs and kisses. This big darling sent me an sms which almost made me cry when I got home… …

-9:57 PM

Thursday, October 25, 2007

-3:00 PM

All by myself
I wanna be all by myself…

Haha. Cycled alone for around one and a half hours because Lee Ching had something urgent to attend to. Frankly speaking, I enjoyed myself. The music of the forest was enchanting. The freedom that floated through the lightly scented air was enthralling. When we finally met up, we went to Yishun and had the popular laksa and of course, I visited my ‘peanut ice-kachang uncle’ too. The next destination? Bottle Tree Park near Khatib! And not forgetting the hot spring before Gambus Avenue. The water is very HOT – and we were soaking our hands and feet in it at one plus in the afternoon! There is this especially friendly uncle who kept talking to both Lee Ching and me. I feel rather burnt now – milk chocolate coated gillie!

-2:54 PM

Wednesday, October 24, 2007

-12:33 AM

Happy birthday to Rus! One of my ‘bestest’ pals. We had dinner at Kublai Khan Mongolian BBQ in Park Mall. The food has ‘deproved’, according to Roger. Haha. There is no such word in the dictionary – Andrew tried to look for it but to no avail. I thought I could escape from Tommy’s corny jokes over Rus’ birthday celebration. Unfortunately, Roger and Ah Drew were just as good! And how did I retaliate? As usual, I ‘victimized’ Ah Drew. HAHAHA.

To share a few “maizey” (instead of always corny, corny and more corny) jokes… Roger said Rus looks better now, compared to the past, when she looked ‘lian qing qing’ (meaning unhealthy). Guess what the HP man (yes, he has been working there for over three years now!) said? He responded with “So now her face is blue?”. Those infected with the Corny Virus will be able to fully empathize with Gil.

You need to know Mandarin to comprehend this – Chinese version of puns. Warning : Get your jacket ready! Roger used the words “xian shu” (virtuous in Mandarin) to describe me. So, I thought it was a genuine compliment. Then he added quickly with “Salty and crispy”! Salty is “xian” and crispy is “su cui” in Mandarin. Argh… …

I was skeptical from then on, when these guys said that the cheesecake there cannot be compared to mine, and that I can cook better etc. How can I take them seriously? And Ah Drew took a few candid shots of me – totally unsightly! Haha. Still, I decided to post a few on my blog.

My favourite is the chocolate coated grapes! The salmon is very fresh and I had a few helpings. I enjoyed the fried shredded carrots with bean sprouts, vegetables and a few slices of beef. Thanks to Roger – always giving me treats. We laughed a lot throughout the meal although the food was just mediocre. And Ah Drew owes the rest of us coffee because it was too late to go for a drink then. Felt like a Friday! =p

Rus, we must catch up soon! I have so much to tell you! =$

Tuesday, October 23, 2007

-11:53 PM

-11:23 AM

This is the ultimate 'Tombstone'... wonder what has the ice-cream got to do with it all...

A test of my stabbing skills?

When I look into Your holiness
When I gaze into Your loveliness
When all things that surround me
Become shadows in the light of You
When I found the joy of reaching Your heart
When my will becomes enthroned in Your love
When all things that surround me
Become shadows in the light of You

Sunday, October 21, 2007

-11:57 PM

We had porridge for dinner at TomSum's place. I contributed preserved mangoes (made by my mummy), peanuts, egg with preserved radish (hot favourite?), salted eggs and otak (from Malaysia). I like the porridge best - cooked by Sharon! And Tommy made the perfect Ribena!

-11:26 PM

It seems that quite a number of my dearest friends are October babies. In fact, there are four! Going to be a busy week with celebrations almost every other day!

Attended Uncle’s BBQ birthday party briefly. Unfortunately, I don’t know his friends well and couldn’t eat the barbecued food as I had to sing the next day. But he was very nice - made a special prata with crabstick for me. =*)

There is a strange twitch in my heart when a friend mentioned the vulnerability of friendships, or for the very matter of fact, relationships nowadays. To a certain degree, I witness to this bizarre phenomenon. Why then is this so? Perhaps we have been entering relationships with unrealistic and unspoken expectations? Perhaps we have been taking interactions for granted? Perhaps we haven’t been counting our blessings?

I would never want to be a burden to my friends, or have them think that I am with them for ulterior motives. Perhaps that is the reason why I seldom ask people for help. I think I have been taught to be independent – sometimes too self-reliant to the point that many don’t see me as a woman? Haha. I remember Sharon told me before I must learn to accept blessings from people. Still learning how to. (^_^)

-4:56 PM

Celebrated a dear friend’s birthday on Saturday at Fish and Co. The seafood platter for two was humungous and the dessert (something by the name of Tombstone), unusual! I tried eating the mussels in the equally giantic pan and frankly speaking, I quite enjoyed them. The fried calamari was splendid. Love the Passionfruit Soda too. The only disappointment was perhaps, the dessert. To match the theme of Halloween, there was raspberry sauce spread all over the plate. Yes, it looked bloody! Although I enjoyed the part on breaking the brown chocolate cookie partly covered by the smooth snowball (ice-cream lah), the process of biting and swallowing it isn’t that fabulous. I can bake better cookies and this gem who was right in front of me can vouch for that! Not a peahen strutting – nothing to show off with plain feathers. My baking skills are mediocre. Left the restaurant fully contented – few things can beat catching up with good friends! Thanks, Buddy, for your generosity and company!

-4:37 PM

My Didar and Prince Jojo... The latter made me have a rather sleepless night because he said "ai ni" (love you in Mandarin) to me! It was spoken with such tenderness and love... my heart melted from the inside out! This anxious and super excited Godma almost went around telling everyone on Sunday before and after service! Hee... =0

And for that, he deserves another big KISS!

I remember giving Andrew his birthday present in September and guess what I saw in his pouch when we had our worship practice on Saturday (20th October)? The wrapper!!! Couldn't resist from taking a picture of it... did it rather overtly... What't there to hide, Ah Drew? Plain lazy to even throw the wrapper? Going to expose you this time round. People, give it to him when you see him in church! Hahaha. *evil* This is one guy I am pretty rough to... hehe. Am always hitting him on his back and shoulders, so much so many think I bully him. But heh, that's just one of my ways to communicate! It is free massage!

-4:31 PM

Went to Tong Shui. Simply love the peanut butter with toast. Notice it is “peanut butter with toast” and not “toast with peanut butter”. To me, the main attraction is not really the bread, though it does complement the thick peanut butter sauce extremely well. Those peanuts must have gotten into my head. Haha.

Friday, October 19, 2007

-11:36 PM

Today’s tutorial is deep. The kind of questions asked can really get you thinking. I am not talking about theoretical stuff here. It is the abstract that surrounds you every second. Do you know of their existence? Yes, things run so quickly that I fail to pause and think through thoroughly. At times I do, but have not the luxury to dwell further. Sometimes, I feel that it is fascinating to challenge culture, norms, stereotypes etc. Do we ever think about why we think, how we think, what we think… …

Perhaps many will tremble and shiver at the mention of terrorists. But they are heroes to some as they always fight for a cause. They are also known as freedom fighters. Is there a terrorist in you? What do you fight for?

You can be brave when you have nothing (to lose).

You are weak and vulnerable when you love something / somebody – because you are scare to lose it / him or her. In the end, we become voluntary subjects to those that we cherish. Do you dare to love?

We give up much to gain what is of little worth.

-11:09 PM

Shuxin, Sylvia and I met up for lunch at Jurong Point, before going to school for project discussion today. We went to Siam Kitchen and as usual, had much fun, laughter and good food.

Sylvia's lunch...

Crackers...

My lunch...
My ice milk tea!!!

-11:03 PM

Shuxin's lunch...

Rainy days...

Actually, NIE campus is pretty nice...

-10:59 PM

TomSumJo and I went to Miss Clarity Café! Finally! The place is everything sweet and cute – most gals would love it. Sadly, the food isn’t that great, though the ambience made up for it. Unless you are picky about food, this place is recommended to be a great place to chill out. I only love the side dish that came along with the chicken – potato and mushroom fricassee. For more, look out for Sharon’s blog!!!

-1:14 AM

I made cheesecakes again! In the middle of the night! Actually I am a little tired but after looking at them, I feel a great sense of satisfaction. What do you think? Do they whet your appetite?