rediscovering eden
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Who am I, that the Lord of all the earth
Would care to know my name
Would care to feel my hurt
Who am I, that the bright and morning Star
Would choose to light the way
For my ever wandering heart
Not because of who I am
But because of what You've done
Not because of what I've done
But because of who You are
I am a flower quickly fading
Here today and gone tomorrow
A wave tossed in the ocean
A vapor in the wind
Still You hear me when I'm calling
Lord, You catch me when I'm falling
And You've told me who I am
I am Yours, I am Yours
Who am I, that the eyes that see my sin
Would look on me with love
and watch me rise again
Who am I, that the voice that calmed the sea
Would call out through the rain
And calm the storm in me
Whom shall I fear
Whom shall I fear
I am yours
dailies
Sunday, August 24, 2008
-7:59 PM
I opened the book filled with His love stories and cried my heart out. That was the time He impressed on me this particular verse and I was comforted in a way which transcended my own understanding. He knew of my pain and heart-brokenness. After all, I had wanted to marry him. The tremendous emotional ache could only be soothed by His presence.
Do not grieve, for the joy of the Lord is your strength – Nehemiah 8:10
The recent sermons at CEFC have been on the topic of joy and I’m reminded of this verse through the preaching and songs. Indeed, I left one with disappointments and entered another with hope and joy. *smile* He is good, all the time! Not going to be robbed of my birthright – God calls me to a joy that is great, true and abiding! It’s not euphoria for a fleeting moment but a promise of His everlasting faithfulness. Reminded of another beautiful song:
What Majesty, what mystery, the God of all eternity, stepped into time and gave Himself for me. Your Hand is seen in galaxies, yet Your presence dwells in me, as vast and yet, You’re still within our reach. Here and now, here in this moment. Here and now, I turn to You. All that my searching heart has longed for can be found. Coz You’re in this moment, here and now.
Sharon shared that she saw the Lord welcoming her during one service a few Sundays ago. Actually, when I knelt down that morning, I saw the Lord standing right in front of me and extending His hand to me – He wanted to lift me up. Well, I can’t kneel properly because of a bone which juts out on my right knee cap since a car accident when I was in Primary five. He said He knows my agony… how can I not be touched? I am His child. *loved*
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I don’t know exactly how to express my gratitude and I wouldn’t want to take things for granted. So, Tommy, Sharon and Joash, I want to thank you. Thank you for loving me and going the extra mile to make my days. I know Tommy is thinking of a corny joke as he reads this. They have been coming to NIE on Monday evenings for dinner. In reality, they are traveling purposely to this rather ‘ulu’ and deserted place just so I can get a free ride home. Tommy also drove me to school for the past two Wednesdays for my 8.30am tutorials, not to forget the rides to and fro church etc. Sharon is one hot and brilliant mama – always keeps me in the loop for good stuff. Jo is the baby who warms my heart regardless of how aloof and ‘dao’ he can be at times. Can’t wait for another baby to come along! Hee.
Huiling drew this on me during one tutorial - she gets restless easily. Funny!
Am often stuck in the middle of nowhere due to my tuitions on Tuesdays, Thursdays and Fridays. Usually buy my dinner and settle somewhere near the tuition centre for my dinners. I have my favourite 'sanctuary' and realised recently that I could have died without knowing the reason. Look at this!
Went JB with my second family, Didar and Dawn on Saturday after my tuitions in the morning. We had lunch at KFC and these desserts caught my eyes!
Didn't get to try the Nasi Lemak Wrap because we had chicken.
And I got my nails done! Had to cover up a blue black on my right toe underneath the nail - has been there since the Rise & Rumble Camp. Sharon's painted nails are very 'princessy'. Pretty! But the manicurist scraped off bits of my flesh in the process of clearing my dead skin on my right sole. *Aw*
Also bought some moon cakes back. Tried a few exotic favours such as curry, tiramisu and cranberry. It's amazing how adventurous and creative the making of moon cakes has become!
I can't comprehend the callow ways of some people. *sigh* Shouldn't be bothered by them.
Poor bro is equally bothered by her. Haa.
I had thought I have a break from tuitions for this week but I was wrong. Should I give up one assignment? Need more time for myself... ...
